xabier

i really have no idea why im writing here.
anyway, i dont know how, but i was suddenly in front of the computer and ended up here,so here goes.

tuesday,10 march
the cashier lady at Yogya riau junction had a scar on her arm
the cashier lady at Hypermart BIP had a scar on her arm
the extra friend on our spontanious 'journey' had a scar on his arm
i would love to say that all 3 had the scars on their LEFT forearm, but im not quite sure :/.
that was one of the best days ive had in a long time

wednesday,11 march
madre called to inform bout singapore internship
padre called for that too AND tht xabier is staying at the clinic because of his digestion problems
but padre said he's ok and that he'll be eating 'normal food' instead of science diet (baca = HEMAT.hahaha)
thursday,12 march
8.40am padre called (my fuckin phone wasn't silenced, n i forgot to adjust the volume).sport jantung sesaat, tp ternyata he just wanted to confirm tht the thursday yang tgl merah is on the 26th,not next week.so i said,'sure,i'll def be there to eat n play with xabier :D!'
me n litya helped ayu look for kosan,n while pit-stopping at litya's place, out of the blue (gr2 lg 'siiiiing' gr2 ayu msh stress mo kos dmn) i ended up telling her 'bout xabier's condition from last wednesday.
koboy-surprise nesia-sleep
today,friday,13 march, 7 am
aya barged into my room n gave me her handphone...
went to order travel,packed my bag,went to litya's to get my phone,ended up late 5 mins n ordering the 9am one, got L.A.+lighter from alfamart,ate indomierebustelor,back to citi for coffe n smoke in the drivers 'lounge' (nuhun kang2),brangkat..
this ended up being one of the worst days in my life

*intermezzo :
guess what i got on the fox wrapper in the car :
1."kesulitan cenderung menghasilkan sifat yang hebat"
2."kebahagiaan itu datang setelah kita menerima ketidakbahagiaan itu sendiri"
and at home:
3."kesabaran itu pahit,tetapi manis buahnya"
ha.bangsat.so not the time for introspeksi diri, and analyzing,'sign' reading.

and the whole 2 hours otw to jakarta felt like a decade, with me, thinking up all those above.
ipod didnt help much (tho it gave me 2 songs i wanted the most,n lasted for the 24 songs on my playlist that i asked to 'not die before the playlist ends' (batre sekarat.)
these are the kind of things where i hate my analyzing and 'sign-reading' nature :
1. 3 times in a row scar = good
2. my parents never call me 2 days in a row, plus sport jantung n nagging feeling never did end after the first call (though vague).
and just now i read my old sms's, n there was my mom's sms 'come to jakarta if u can! menu hidup bahagia : yummy2 eat dad n xabier!' when i was having a workshop at my school, persistently (she seldom does this too).
both above made me want to be impulsive n go home on the spot, but i didnt.

ironic no?
scar(bad)= good
happy times ahead planned (good)= bad

he was only a puppy for fucks sake.
why make him suffer to this extent? he didn't deserve this shit.

love you xabier, really wish i could see you in monster form :'j..hahaha
say hi to wee n edon n all my friends dogs as well..

R.I.P.
Xabier
October 2008 - 13 March 2009